Author: Mike Crowl

CROWN of my day’s achievements: finding the weight of a
KOALA in our care. The other vets gave up, but before I took the
FERRY home, I managed to weigh the koala toddler, and not
SPANK the side of my head with frustration. Cute kid.

[One of my more odd poems…coming back to it, I’m not quite sure what I was saying, in part…]

The
GUIDE, with a botanist’s penchant for
FLAIR of a particular type, pointed out each
DAISY on the way, overlooking the particular. My
PURSE hurt; I’d paid for something more compelling.

CLEAN carefully the crown so
REGAL, my crown-cleaning servant. Be not
HASTY, my crown-cleaning
CRONY, thou hast missed a jewel or two.

TOUGH was the cough; staying home cost me
DOUGH, rough though it was, lying home
DYING, reading Ulysses with Leopold
PLUME – sorry, Bloom – in the tomb of my room.

Oh yer
CANNY shove yer granny off a bus;
NOMADder if she never makes a fuss.
SNORT loud she might and biff yer, she’s
CABIN (‘scuse the cold) for to get yer; oh yer
CANNY shove yer granny off a bus.

(Sorry for the matching line at the end, aficionados!)

The opening line ‘pinched’ from this song

A SCOT, wha hae with Wallace bled, did
FEIGN that he himself were dead; used
CHALK to mark his face as pale, and
EAGER, lived to tell the tale.

[With apologies to Robbie Burns and nothing to do with this DQP]

THETA, in uppercase symbol, is shorthand for all manner of
RAJAH-important science and maths statements. My favourite, the to-the-
MANOR-born Pentaquark: four quarks and a antiquark fixed together, like a
LOUSE fixed between two fingers on the day you finally catch one.

SPINY spine shivers – the
WALTZ tune is serpentine, the tune slithers amongst the
ORGAN reeds, equally creeping, sneaking, snaking through my bones,
ALONE, chilled, in this densely crammed dance hall.

‘SEIZE the day’ they say and the
ANGST
BEGAN: ‘Was I seizing the day in the way I would seize a
PEACH, ripe, ready to slurp – once I’d got over the furry skin texture again which always makes me feel as though I’m wondering what it is I’m really eating.

AUDIO bits fixed on the side of your head hear sounds in the
INBOX fixed in the inside of your head, provide a
CHART of sound waves to the mists of your brain, where they’re
DEALT with by grey matter and reproduced again.